Prove your humanity

If you’re looking for a unique night out with friends look no further than the new Holey Moley Golf Club which opened its doors in Northbridge yesterday. It is the largest Holey Moley venue to date, boasting a 27-hole course made up of three pop-culture themed rooms that will entertain and inevitably frustrate. With other venues located in Melbourne, Sydney, Adelaide, and Brisbane, Perth will be the fifth installment in Holey Moley’s Australian reign.Despite being a little pricey—with the full 27 holes costing $49.50 per player—the club has strived to create a course that is hard to forget. With holes ranging from the infamous ‘Ass Hole’, which features Donald Trump’s face on a donkey’s ass, to the made-for-Perth installments like ‘Friday Night Footee’ and one of my absolute favourites, ‘Great Putt’, the fantastic Back to the Future hole.

The diverse assortment of visually appealing and complex holes will keep you on your toes, such as ‘Putt Out of Hell’, which requires a carefully timed shot through the spinning spokes of a motorbike wheel, and the infuriatingly tricky crowd favourite, ‘Iron Throne’—which is made out of golf clubs. There are also sport themed holes like ‘Under Locker Key’, music themed ones like ‘Ain’t Nothin’ But a Hound Bog’, as well as the popular film and television themed holes: The Simpsons’ ‘742 Evergreen Terrace’, Jaws’ ‘Gone Fishing’, and Stranger Things’ ‘The Upside Down Room’.

No matter where you are in the course you are only ever a few steps from the bar, with one stationed at either end of the venue with an array of tasty pub grub to enjoy, making Holey Moley the perfect place to go before hitting the town. But keep in mind, there is limited elbow room. Be on the look-out for the inevitable spilt drinks and the bizarre, and generally non-existent, golf etiquette of the drunk masses.

Be prepared to get a little squished on the course too. It can get crowded very quickly, which makes hitting those hole-in-ones even more difficult. Many aspects of the course are very narrow so, not only will you constantly be hitting your ball from awkward angles, but there is often little space to move. I repeatedly found myself balancing on ledges or tripping over hidden railings in dimly lit areas. Those with poor balance or weak ankles, consider yourselves warned.

Due to the lack of space I wouldn’t suggest taking a large group unless you are willing to split up. There is nothing worse than waiting for a stack of people to complete a hole or feeling pressured to rush your shots because of the growing number of golfers waiting expectantly behind you.

All in all, Holey Moley Golf Club is an exciting and unique addition to Perth that provides an entertaining twist on the expectations of mini golf, which makes for a shameless night of childish fun.